... You shall find me a grave man.

ORN: 'Twas a lovely, sunny 50° when I ran my easy 10K today in 1:01'22". The run started out wobbly as I was still uncomfortable from Saturday's long run. But as I warmed up, the aches and pains settled out. The second half of the workout was markedly less sucky that the first. I'm happy tomorrow is a rest day. I'm tired.

I don't share too much about my personal life here, and that's by design. You read this because you are interested in my running, not about the thoughts I have while standing in line at the library. But in the interest of adding a little variety into this text stream, I give you these few tidbits from my daily life.

1. I've been waking up lately with a They Might Be Giants song stuck in my head. Never the same song, either. The day it was "Istanbul (Not Constantinople)" was a good day. "Minimum Wage," not so much.
   
2. Digging a shallow grave at 21:30 by flashlight in the back yard is easier when it has been raining for a couple days. Sam the Hamster: RIP. I hope the puppy doesn't dig you up.
3. Cable modem boxes make excellent coffins for small, dead, domesticated rodents.
   

Someday I'll do the Iroquois Hard 10

ORN: The course my group ran we call the Iroquois Hard 10 because you spiral five miles up the sides of Burnt Knob in Iroqouis Park, and then you spiral back down for five miles. And it's hard. It's not always steep, but it's always rising [or falling] for the whole five miles. And yes, this course forms the first part of the Derby Festival Marathon/Mini-Marathon. Heck of a way to start a marathon. But my daughter turned six yesterday, and I didn't want my running all morning to take anything away from her big day. I skipped my running group and slept in. I wanted to be there for lazing around in bed, eating breakfast, and all that good Saturday morning stuff. Totally worth it. It wasn't until around 15:00 that I broke away from the family and did my 16 miles in 2:46'15".

I did it long after my over-indulgent breakfast at Wild Eggs and after a slice of birthday pizza at Chuck E. Cheese's, so nutritionally speaking, I wasn't ready for this workout. It was a rough one. The first few miles were tough, but I was doing my usual 9'30"-9'45" pace, admittedly a bit fast for a long, slow distance. It wasn't until around mile three, right after the bathrooms at Seneca Park, I hit a good stride and ran in the flow for a few miles.

The weather was schizophrenic. It started out sunny, grew cloudy and threatening rain, then cleared, got cloudy again and rained briefly, cleared.

Then, around mile eight or so, I started to get hungry. Not just a little hungry, but ravenously hungry. So hungry I considered raiding a garbage can. So hungry I considered gobbling down dandelions. Fortunately, I had Gu gels, but really.... I was getting woozy and stumbly, but still I ran on. Heck, I was barely half way through.

Around mile nine, I was certain I had a blister. I thought for sure my toenail was turning black and would be rattling around my shoe before it was all over. [Spoiler alert: no blister at all.]

At about the tenth mile, I was done but still six miles from home. My motivation failed me, and I considered calling home for a rescue. But I thought I'd never hear the end of it, so I kept slogging up Barrett Hill. Around mile 13, I was back at the bathrooms at Seneca Park, choking down water and stretching my cramping hamstrings. At this point, I was running nearly 11 minute miles and hating every minute of it. I managed to get moving again, found my groove, and plodded like a sad, little robot all the way back home.

This was, without a doubt, one of the least fun runs I have done in a long time. And it was all my fault for not eating properly all day. I should have had a bowl of oatmeal or something before I set out. I think I would have been better off if I had something on my stomach. Or perhaps if I had packed along a banana. Instead, when I got home, I devoured everything -- two Clif Bars, some cheese, a hot dog, and later a huge Indian meal.

One day, I will learn.

Get faster the Viking Running™®© way

ORN: Today, I sped across the Clark Memorial Bridge, running the Indiana portion of the KDF Marathon. It turned out to be a hard five mile out-and-back, which I squeezed out in a nice 47'08". I paid for it though. My right hip is sore, deep in the joint.

The semi-autonomous knowbots over at the Runners' Lounge have issued a command: write about getting faster. By your command, I respond.

What I know about getting faster I could fit into an unopened can of sardines. But still, somehow, almost without trying, I have gone from being a consistent 10'30" runner six months ago to being a consistent sub-10' runner now. Yesterday, in fact, I ran six miles at an 8'55" average pace, a feat I'm apparently not through bragging about. [Yesterday, I ran six miles at an 8'55" average pace. Rolls right off the tongue.] Anyway, I cannot say that I have faithfully run regular speed workouts, nor can I say that I have put 100% effort into the ones I did. As far as I can tell, I can chalk up my speed improvements to just two things.

1) I'm running consistently. Since the beginning of the year, nearly three solid months now, I have not missed a single workout. Nor have I cut a workout short. I've run 100% on schedule. Since this consistency is correlated to my improved speed, I am tempted to believe there is a causal relationship, but I know that way lies bad science.Still, in the previous couple years of my running career, my performance never got better than 10'30" or 10'20" per mile, and my running was never consistent for more than three or four weeks in a row. Draw your own conclusions.

2) I'm running lots of hills. Almost all of my workouts during the week are on flat trails, but on Saturdays, my long runs have all been very hilly. I've also tried to run across one of the downtown bridges -- essentially a long-ass hill -- once a week or so. And I haven't wussed out on these hills; I attacked them, giving them a strong effort each time. In fact, I now look forward to hills to break up the tedium of long runs.

Now, faithful readers, I admit I have done the occasional interval workout [probably two this year], a fartlek or two, and an unplanned tempo workout now and then. This is all technically speed work, I guess. But it's been mostly spontaneous, half-hearted, and seldom repeated from one week to the next. In other words, I believe my simple formula of running consistently four times a week and doing hills at least once a week is almost entirely responsible for my improved performance.

Your mileage may vary.

We're mass communicatin' now!

ORN: Today was what the rave run tag is for. Despite the gloomy, rainy weather, I had a great run today. I ran a personal-best in the 10K, 55'18". I'll save you from doing the math; that's an 8'55" average pace. But more than being a speedy run, with me feeling faster and stronger with each mile, today's workout just felt good. Everything clicked. Everything fell into place. I couldn't believe what my body was doing, and then it just kept doing more. Amazing.

Long-time readers know that one of my life-goals is to become huge on the Internet, an online celebrity more along the lines of Wil Wheaton than the Star Wars Kid. Today, I am one step closer to immortality. My first podcasting experience is now online. I participated in a discussion with Amy from Runners' Lounge and BigB from BigB on the Road, on the subject of Getting Started Running. Download it here.

Also, if you plan to run the 2009 Chicago Marathon, I'll see you there. I signed up last night. My buddy, Chris, and I are going to do it. We're going to drive or fly up there, depending on cost, and drag our wives along for a fun couples mini-vacation of sorts. In other words, while Chris and I suffer through 26.2 miles along Lake Michigan, the gals will be sitting somewhere comfortable, sipping wine and cocktails, laughing at us. For this race, I'm going to sign up as a fundraiser for the American Cancer Society. I hope to raise at least $1,000. More on that in a few months.

Can you hear the drums, Fernando?

ORN: Today, I ran 10 kilometers in a decent 59'26". I was slightly sore and stiff from Saturday's long run, but it shook out. I finished strongly and broke in a new pair of Nike Air Zoom Structure Triax 12s. My 11s were totally spent.

I did a little math this weekend, and it depressed me. I found out that in order to qualify for the Boston Marathon [a back-of-the-mind fantasy goal I have, like becoming an astronaut, writing the Great American Novel, or growing a decent-looking beard] I'd need to run a 7'26" mile -- 26.2 of them, actually. In a row. In other words, I would have to shave off at least two full minutes off my pace and run the hell out of October's Chicago Marathon. To achieve this, I would have to do a monstrous training schedule over the summer. And probably sacrifice a goat to Ba'al.

Pros: a) Fresh goat meat. b) Very metal. c) Might bleat others in my age group. [Zing!]
Cons: a) Would it even work? b) Messy. c) PETA might stop sending me free address labels.

Like anything worth doing, this will take research, planning, and commitment.

Just like fund-raising! I'm happy to report that, thanks to donations large and small from a variety of good-hearted people, I was able to meet my goal of $500 for Gilda's Club of Louisville. A month to go before the marathon, I achieved what I set out to do. Then I thought, "Well, you achieved that... why not raise the bar?!" Like, set a new goal of $750 or $1,000. But Wifey pointed out that donors might be discouraged by that. Besides, I have exhausted my network and am unlikely to get many more donors. Hand-wringing aside, thanks to all the people who chipped in for this worthy cause. And if you were putting off donating, please go ahead and do so.

Last thing, we adopted a new dog this weekend. His name is Fernando and is a little, black ray of sunshine. Everyone, except for our 17-year-old incumbent dog Missy, is thrilled. Missy is profoundly insulted and wants to murder all of us in our sleep and feast on our giblets.

Sqrt(196)

ORN: Yesterday, I ran 14 miles in 2:20'49", the longest distance I've ever run. The weather was perfect -- 55° and sunny -- and I even got a little tan line on my wrist from my watch. Wildlife aplenty was in and around the parks, like chipmunks and squirrels, doing their spring thing. Tons of people were riding bikes, pushing strollers, and running. On Dog Hill [a.k.a. Barrett Hill, a place where people let their dogs go off-leash and run amok], there were about a half-dozen large dogs of various types running around having fun, losing their minds a little as if they'd be cooped up too long because of winter. I guess everybody was feeling the same way.

I peed three times. Fortunately, the bathrooms were all open around the parks, so I didn't have to risk an indecent exposure charge.

So the run itself was uneventful but there was a lot to watch and a lot going on. The rest of the day I was a slug. Tired and sore.

Vernal Equi-Rocks!

ORN: Today, on the last day of an awful winter, I ran five miles in a nice 47'11", which is my best time for this distance all year. I didn't feel like I was running especially fast, especially considering I still am having that shoulder pain that I complained about yesterday.

I couldn't be happier that Winter is on it's way out. I am not a Winter person. Sure, after winning the lottery, I'd like to live in Boston. But I would only spend the six months of the year there that are bearable. The rest of the year I'd be in Hawaii watching pineapples grow and lava flow, busting rhymes with mahalo.

Serious case of what's-the-point-itis

ORN: Ran 10 km in 1:01'15". After weeks of having great runs, I was due for a bad day, and this was it. It started out fine, but around the third mile or so, I started having that shoulder pain I've been getting lately. It was especially bad; bad enough that I had to stop a couple times and stretch it out. It's in my right shoulder, and the pain feels like my arm is going to pop out of its socket. Eventually, that went away, and something else took its place. Severe stomach cramps. They weren't side stitches. I know what those are and can cope with them. This was something else. It was all across my abdomen, where my stomach and diaphragm are. I nearly was doubled over with the pain. I walked it off, and it, too, passed.

I'm surrounded by sick people in this crazy town. I fear I've caught something. I cannot afford to get sick at this stage of training.

But for now, here I am, hat in hand.

First day of the rest of my life

ORN: Today, I ran 10 kilometers in 59'43". My hamstrings were tight and sore from the 10 miler on Saturday and the seven mile walk yesterday. Wifey is walking the Triple Crown of Running, and I am being supportive. Tomorrow, full rest day. Seriously, y'all.

Last week [22 miles] was my last easy week before the marathon. This week, I will do 31 miles [14 mile long run], then 33 [16], 37 [18], and finally 40 [20] the week ending April 11th. I'm telling you this because my posts will probably start sounding redundant. ["OMG, this is the longest I've ever run, etc."] Frankly, I am anxious to get on with it. Six weeks to go before the race, less than 50% of my training miles left to go, and I am impatient to pin on my bib and take off. Let's rock this joint.

I think I have an answer to the inevitable post-marathon, then-what? depression. My buddy Chris has talked me into doing the Chicago Marathon with him in October. I was going to do the Louisville Marathon, which is in October also, but I'd rather do Chicago. I'm in the earliest stages of researching it, but I think the odds are better than even that I'll do it.

I've lost my frakkin' mind.

The weather could have been better

ORN: This morning, I ran 10 miles in 1:42'24", which is my best 10-miler time this year. It was a great run, taking me from Seneca to Cherokee to Tyler Park. I ran with a guy from the running group until our routes diverged, but he was a few seconds per mile faster than I. We didn't really run together, I guess.

The weather was cool (low 40s) and overcast, until the last mile or two when it started drizzling.

The great parts about today's run were that I ran through new parts of Louisville. I haven't been in the Tyler Park area in years, and whereas I used to hang out on Bardstown Road all the time, I hardly ever go there now. But I ran through these areas this morning, and it was great. Also, I ran through the Cherokee Triangle neighborhood, which has all sorts of beautiful, old mansions. I ran past the statue of Daniel Boone and then up to Hogan's Fountain. It was just a wonderfully varied route.

Only in running...

ORN: This morning, I ran four miles in a slow and steady 38'51". I was slightly achy and tired from this week's earlier speed fests. So today, I eased up on the gas and just cruised. I under-dressed for the weather today [30°] and was uncomfortable most of the way.

The idea-bots at the Runners' Lounge assigned us to write on the theme of "only in running...." My first draft of this post was all about snot and other bodily unpleasantness, but I'm taking the high road instead.

Only in running do I find a subject I want to write and read about so consistently. I've started and abandoned more writing projects in my life than I care to mention. I've started paper journals, short stories, comic book scripts, and novels. None of them, have I seen through for very long. I have over 400 posts here. Sure, I have abandoned this place from time to time, but I keep coming back because I keep running. And running gives me stuff to write about. I'm always learning about it, and about myself, and that gives me more and more stuff to say.

Running is the proverbial self-licking ice cream cone.

But sometimes I run out of things to say, and I cut the post short.

Lame post day

ORN: I let my day get away from me so I didn't get around to running until after work. And I overate at work. I was ravenous today. Consequently, I felt like I weighed 100 pounds more than usual as I ran four miles in 37'30". Not bad, but I flew through my last mile in 8'55"!

Talking about how awesome I am gets old for me also

ORN: The temperature was a cool 46° when I bounced out the front door to do four miles in a zippy 36'20". You read that correctly, faithful reader. I ran a 9'04" average pace. The mile splits worked out to be 9'19", 8'47", 8'48", and 9'22". This is from the same guy who was happy to run 10'30" miles late last year. I am living proof that consistency pays off. The correlation is undeniable: I am running more consistently than ever; I am running faster than ever.

I ran westward on the RiverWalk, my default route, and had a blast. As I ran, the angel on my one shoulder pointed out that this week is my last recovery/easy week before the marathon. Perhaps I ought to ease up. But the devil on my other shoulder slammed his pitchfork into my shoulder, saying, "You got gas in the tank, kid. RUN!" [I'm having honest-to-Betsy shoulder pain when I run, but that's another post.] My legs felt strong, so I punched it.

It's funny. Last year, after I ran the Derby Festival Half Marathon, I was wiped out. I couldn't run a step for a week. Saturday, I ran a personal best for 13.1 miles, and today I ran four miles at a second off of my 5K PR pace. This is what you get when you run consistently. I am a total believer. If you run your plan week-in/week-out, it will pay off.

One last brag before I go, I am finally ahead of the pace bunny to run 1,000 miles in 2009. That's a back-burner goal, but I haven't been ahead of pace all year until last week. At the risk of being nauseatingly cocky, I am quite pleased with myself.

Best half-marathon time ever

ORN: This morning, the gods granted us the first day of unreservedly, unqualified awesome weather. The sun shone, the birds chirped, and I ran 13.1 miles in 2:13'43", which beat my previous half-marathon PR by more than eight minutes. I'm getting stronger people. Lock up your Clif Bars.

Our running group had a skeleton crew of die-hards. Everyone else, including my wife, was doing the Anthem 5K Fitness Classic downtown. [Wifey walked it and did great.] I ran with Aaron, a nice guy who happens to be an actuary. He also runs faster than I do, so he's largely responsible for my good time today. I didn't struggle to keep up, but left on my own, I might not have pushed it so hard. I didn't have tons of motivation today.

I broke the run into chunks. I ran 3.5 miles to the park bathrooms where we meet. We chatted for a minute or two and stretched, and then took off. I did six miles, keeping up with Aaron. Then we all gabbed for a few minutes, post run, and went our separate ways. I ran the 3.5 miles back to the house and made it an even 13.1 practically at my doorstep.

Seriously, y'all, this was a spring fever kind of day. Come on! Let's go outside and play!

Mistakes were made

ORN: Today, I ran out and back across the Clark Memorial Bridge, twice, because my running mentor, Tracy, suggested it. Since the wind was up, I got to wrestle with my fear of heights as visions of a great tsunami lifting me up and over gave me the heebie-jeebies. Also, I got to cope with boredom because running back-and-forth across a nearly mile-long bridge gets dull after a while. Oh, and the whole thing took me 49'12". Now, I just have to run 13 miles on Saturday, and I'll be done for the week. Yipee!

This week's Take It and Run Thursday theme is Common Running Mistakes. I've made my share in my brief running career, but the primary one is waiting until my mid-30s to become a runner. I had opportunities to become a lifelong runner when I was a younger and less massive man, but I failed to seize them.

• In high school, I was on the varsity track team, and I only did it for the Letter. I was the slowest runner on the team. I could have been a stronger runner had I not a) smoked and b) taken training so lightly. Seriously, I probably would never been a track star, but I could have built a strong base on becoming a lifelong runner. Incidentally, my best pace at this point in my life was 7'20". I'd stick my tongue on a flag pole in the dead of winter to run 7'20" nowadays.
  
• In college, in Navy ROTC, I had to run with a group of jarheads three times a week. It was a Marine Corps thing; you wouldn't understand. But I never took running seriously back then either. In fact, I dreaded it. I only ran when they made me, my diet was awful, and I frequently drank a lot before early morning distance sessions. Had I taken this phase of my running life seriously, I would have been able to do distance running in one of the greatest running cities in the world. I was probably running 8'30" miles at this point, but that's a guess.
  
• After college, when I was in the Navy, I should have run if only to keep my semi-annual physical readiness tests from being such a hassle. Heck, the running portion of the test was only a mile and a half. Back then, I joked -- almost bragged -- that I ran just three miles a year. I worked in a culture that required physical fitness. Had I run at this phase, I might not have gained that pesky 10 pounds [between 170 and 180] that never seems to want to leave. I had to run 8'30"/mile to pass, and I just barely did all eight times I took the test.
  

Now that I am 37, proud to be running a consistent 9'30"/mile pace, I look back at all the opportunities I had to become a lifelong runner, and I think to myself, "How typical." How typical to not realize a good thing when you have it. How much better shape would I be in now if I had started running when I was 15-16 and had 22 years of training behind me?

Don't get me wrong. I am very happy with my fitness level right now, and I am in love with my running habit. Those two or three hours a week [or four... or five] I am on the road are precious to me. I only wish I could have enjoyed this incredibly satisfying lifestyle when I was a younger man. My advice to you whipper-snappers: start running early and don't stop.

Spontaneous tempo run

ORN: On this lovely spring day, I ran six miles in 58'11" with a three mile tempo effort sandwiched in there. The tempo part was fun but comfortably hard, as they say. I could have sustained that pace for longer, but I decided to stick to my plan. Not that I had a plan, really. I just decided to attempt a tempo run right before I walked out the door.

To further jazz up today's workout, I ran east rather than west along the Ohio, which is more park-like and less post-apocalyptic.

Incidentally, for the curious, I sketched out the route for the KDF Marathon, which I shall totally smoke on April 25th. The race is pretty doggone hilly, as you can see. The sadists that created the route decided it would be hilarious to route the marathoners through the hilliest parks in town and make them cross a bridge spanning the wide, wide Ohio River. I think the reason why the map draws out to 27.5 miles in Gmap is that I probably wasn't entirely accurate in how I sketched the run through Churchill Downs, home of the Kentucky Derby, the Fastest Two Minutes in Sports. That stretch, dear reader, is the best part of the race IMHO.

Around mile nine, you're starting to get a little tired, especially since you've just run through Iroquois Park, some of the highest ground in the county. You've got lots of flat road to run on now. So you duck into the Downs for a quick jog around the Infield. The thoroughbreds, some of whom may be competing in the Kentucky Derby in just a few days, are finishing their morning training runs. You are right there with them, surrounded by all that history, beauty, and grace. It's a good mile.

TGI-March

ORN: This morning, I ran five miles in 51'12". Yeah, I know. I took it way slow because I was way tired, way burned out, and on auto-pilot in terms of motivation. I mean, I ran, but I wasn't exactly bounding out the door. I am still tired from this weekend. After the 12 miler on Saturday, I foolishly behaved like a good, supportive husband and walked six miles with Wifey. She's walking the Triple Crown. I should have rested, but she really appreciated it.

I am so glad it's March. That means it'll be spring soon, right? Right? Today, it was 22° when I ran. I saw a dude out running with a t-shirt that said "Winter Sucks." Amen, brother.

Incidentally, I ran 92.6 miles in February. That's eight more miles than I ran in February 2008. Makes sense, considering I was training for a half marathon then and am training for a full marathon now. I ran more in February 2009 than every month of 2008 except March. If things go according to plan, I ought to obliterate the 100-mile mark this month and be darned close to 300 miles for the year.