Ten Years Gone

ORN: 8.0 miles in 1:28:19. Not much to say about today's run except that it was too early for a Saturday.

Ten years ago today, I was discharged from the US Navy. My discharge marked the end of more than a decade of bad career choices and erroneous beliefs.

The Navy suited me. I did exceptionally well as a Sailor. I left as a Yeoman Second Class with two Navy Achievement Medals, a Good Conduct Medal, and some other lesser decorations and awards. Still, despite my success, and despite some fond memories, the fact remains that my enlistment was the termination of a long series of mistakes.

Mistake #1: Being enamored of Ronald Reagan and his sense of noxious nationalism and hubris. I bought into all the star-spangled crap Reagan was selling, and I thought that a career in the military would be a fitting and noble thing. In short, I bought into the Old Lie.

Mistake #2: Accepting a Naval ROTC scholarship. Although some of my fondest memories of my early adulthood were thanks to my ability to go to Boston University, which I never would have been able to afford without the scholarship, it was a huge mistake to do so. I was no more suited to military life than the hippies and punks that I preferred to hang out with rather than my fellow midshipmen.

Mistake #3: Choosing to be a US Marine Option midshipman. You can see how these mistakes are building on each other. Perhaps my life would have been better as a regular Navy midshipman, perhaps as an intelligence officer or a SWO-daddy, but I had to step even further away from my true self and strive to be a jarhead. This was grievous, persistent self-delusion and inevitably lead too...

Mistake #4: Not quitting sooner. I postponed the decision to quit my Navy ROTC scholarship until the second semester of my junior year. By quitting, I acquired five semesters of obligation to the Navy amounting to over $37,000, not to mention a couple loans my parents took out to help with my other expenses for those two-plus years. One way or another, I had to pay them all back.

Mistake #5: Enlisting. The easy way out was to enlist in the Navy as a Seaman. Rather than pay back Uncle Sam under murderously repressive terms, enlisting for four years would erase my debt. Technically, two years would have sufficed, but then I would be chipping barnacles off the bottom of the ship as an unrated seaman. A four year enlistment ensured I would get a school, and therefore a job, and therefore a higher standard of living. After graduating from my hometown public university, I did give the job search a good, long try; but in 1993, in the midst of the first President Bush's recession, nobody was interested in hiring me. Certainly, nobody was willing to pay me a salary that would allow me to handle my debts. So I enlisted.

There are more mistakes that I could list, but I've gone on long enough. I should say that, despite everything I've written here, I am proud of my service. I made the best of it, and I did nothing I'm ashamed of. There's some benefits, after all. Once a year, I get to be fawned over a little. [I feel like campaigning to get veterans like myself presents on Veterans' Day. I would trade in a lifetime of senseless parades for a new Vespa.]

I should also emphasize I don't begrudge people who enlist, though I think they would have to have rocks in their heads to do so with this stupid war on. I think most of the people serving today are doing a first-rate job despite having to serve one of the worst Presidents ever and having to fight in one of the most ill-conceived, mismanaged, and unnecessary wars we've ever had the misfortune to entangle ourselves in. Most of all, I think they should be treated much better than they are when they come back. Like given free Vespas, assuming they have the ability to ride them. Or at least decent health care.

Thank the gods it is all over for me though..., ten years gone.

1. High School - Isaac Green And The Skalars
2. Natural Mystic - Bob Marley
3. The Wizard - Black Sabbath
4. Lufthans - KMFDM
5. Salt Lane Shuffle - Clue J and His Blues Blasters
6. Oh Bondage Up Yours - X Ray Spex
7. Somewhere to Lay My Head - Bob Marley and the Wailers
8. I Hope That I Get Old Before I Die - They Might Be Giants
9. Possessed to Skate - Suicidal Tendencies
10. What Do You Know? [Instrumental] - KMFDM
11. Rat Race - The Specials
12. We Want a Rock - They Might Be Giants
13. Braggadocio - MC Frontalot
14. Why Can't I Be You? - The Cure
15. Eyes & Ears - Bim Skala Bim
16. Commando - Ramones
17. In My Life - The Beatles
18. Rukumbine - Shenley Duffus
19. 400 Bucks - Reverend Horton Heat
20. Fscking in Rhythm & Sorrow - The Sugarcubes
21. Bye Bye Baby - Social Distortion
22. Call Me - Blondie
23. Name - Rancid
24. Follow My Leader - The Loafers
25. Soon Come - Bob Marley
26. Stripped [*] - Rammstein
27. St. James Infirmary - Cab Calloway and His Orchestra